'Desperate Housewives': Breaking And Entering
Locks Can't Keep Intruders Out Of Wisteria Lane
Melissa Harrold, Staff Writer
While Wisteria Lane seems to be a fairly safe, well-to-do
neighborhood (despite the various levels of kooky behavior
by its residents), this week's episode suggested that maybe
life behind white picket fences isn't always what it appears.
The show started of with a break-in at one of the houses in
the neighborhood. Oddly, the perpetrator didn't remove anything
from the house.
Later in the episode, Mike Delfino (who has been lusted after
by Susan and Edie since moving into the neighborhood),
admitted to breaking into the house in a conversation with
a not-too-pleasant, unidentified man in a park. This newcomer
quickly established his creepiness when he heard children playing.
"That's a sweet sound, laughter like that. It makes me
mad," he said.
If happy children make a guy that angry, he must be evil.
Mike seems to have his hang-ups about whatever dirty deals
this boss man wants to undertake, and he is torn between
continuing this shady business or developing a relationship
with Susan.
Meanwhile, Gabrielle learned that someone very close to her
husband, Carlos, might be a little shady herself. Carlos' mother,
Juanita ("Mama") Solis, showed up at Carlos' request
to investigate Gabrielle's extramarital recreation with the
teenage gardener, John.
After Gabrielle played a dirty trick on Mama Solis that ended
up with her being accused of shoplifting, Mama Solis tipped her
hand to some dirty dealing of her own. She described to Gabrielle
that after her former husband dared to hit Carlos at age 4, she
told Carlos that he had run away with a waitress to El Paso.
But, as she wielded her sharp, metal knitting needles, Mama
Solis implied that God had given them to her as "tools
for her salvation" from a violent husband. Yikes.
Although Gabrielle is a spoiled brat who probably deserves a
reminder of how good her life with Carlos is, no one deserves
the knitting needle treatment Mama Solis threatens.
Speaking of spoiled brats, Lynette and her husband, Tom, tried
everything to bust their twin terrors into an elite private
school, because all the public schools were apparently done
dealing with them. After trying basically everything to get
them in, a discouraged Tom had the nerve to suggest to Lynette
that she should "make some sacrifices" and homeschool
the boys.
Lynette, who gave up a high-paying job to raise her family, was
having none of that.
"I made sacrifices over the past six years. If another
sacrifice has to be made, I think it's your turn on the
merry-go-round," Lynette said.
Although Lynette didn't let Tom hijack her sanity, Zach Young,
the son of the deceased Mary Alice, showed in this episode that
his sanity might be long gone already.
Bree and the sullen Zach found common ground as they bonded over
the losses of their mothers. When Zach expressed his sadness that
his mom wouldn't be around for Christmas, Bree decided to surprise
him with the promise of an impromptu Christmas dinner. But, Rex,
Bree's estranged husband, asked her out to dinner and she had to
cancel.
What happened then was something out of a bizarre horror movie,
where the monster is a deranged Santa Claus. Bree and Rex returned
home to find that Zach had broken into their house, put up a Christmas
tree (which he had chopped down from the yard), strung lights
everywhere and put up three stockings: one for Zach, Paul (his
father) and Mary Alice (his deceased mother).
With the poor, guilt-ridden Zach, the intimidating Mama Solis
and the mysterious Mike Delfino around, the residents of Wisteria
Lane had a lot of drama on their hands this week that no locks
could keep out.
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