Episode 01.17 - "There Won't Be Trumpets" Mary Alice: "In the Coma Ward at Sacred Heart Hospital, the dreams begin just after midnight. The pitch black of night gives way to vivid images that comfort the dreamer until the morning. Gus, the custodian, dreams of someday winning the lottery and quitting his thankless job. Howard, the security guard, envisions a luxurious retirement in the tropics. Ruth Ann, the night nurse, fantasizes about leaving her husband. But the most vivid dreams of all belong to the patient in Room 312. Yes, Juanita Solis had been dreaming steadily for five months. Sometimes of the shocking secret she had uncovered. Other times, she dreamt of the accident that had put her in the hospital. But her most common dream was the one in which she finally told her son the truth. And then one night...Juanita Solis decided it was time to wake up. Even though she knew she was about to die, Juanita didn’t care. The truth was finally going to come out. Sadly for Juanita, this was one dream that would never come true." Mary Alice: "We all honor heroes for different reasons. Sometimes for their bravery, sometimes for their daring, sometimes for their goodness, but mostly we honor heroes because at one point or another we all dream of being rescued." Rex: "What are these?" Bree: "They’re brochures for youth detention centers." Rex: "How long have you had these?" Bree: "They’ve been in the drawer for a few months. I had a feeling we might be needing them." Rex: "Bree, I don’t know." Bree: "We have to admit that we need help. If we can’t get through to Andrew then we have to find someone who can." Rex: "You really want to send our son away to some prison camp?" Bree: "Oh come on, don’t be so dramatic. Some of these places actually look fun. Look. Camp Hennessey." (reading) "Camp Hennessey teaches kids respect for authority and boundaries in a summer camp-like atmosphere." Rex: "The perimeter is surrounded by an electrified fence." Bree: "Well, you have to admit that’s an efficient way to teach respect for boundaries." Rex: "I’ll talk to him, all right? I’ll sit him down for a little old-fashioned heart to heart." Bree: "You talk to him all you want. I’m gonna check out the place with the electrified fence." Gabrielle: "These funeral homes make a fortune trying to convince people to overspend." Carlos: "What are you saying?" Gabrielle: "Well, I’m saying your mother was a sensible woman. She wouldn’t be comfortable with all these bells and whistles. Maybe this one. Wood veneer!" Carlos: "You never liked Mama." Gabrielle: "Well, it’s awfully hard to like someone who actively hates your guts. She always thought you married beneath you and she let me know it." Carlos: "She loved you." Gabrielle: "She treated me like trash!" (crosses herself) "God rest her soul." Carlos: "I’m putting my mother in the grave. Now is not the time to pinch pennies." Gabrielle: "Carlos, we’re not exactly flush with cash right now. Let her be true to her roots. She was born humble and barefoot." Lynette: "You’re a better woman than me. I would have ripped that open with my teeth. Aren’t you dying to know what he wrote?" Susan: "Yes. What if it just a bunch of far-fetched stories." Bree: "Well, you should assume that it is." Lynette: "Why?" Bree: "Well, think about how good men are at lying on the spot. I mean, God forbid, you should give them time and a pen!" Susan: "Are you asking me out on a date?" Bill: "That sounds kind of formal for a burrito and a can of soda but, yeah, I guess I am." Edie: "Susan, you know I try. I try to look past your flaws, your klutziness, that, that faux vulnerability, your hair, but you look for ways to push my buttons." Susan: "He just wants to buy me a burrito." Edie: "Susan, please. Let me like you." Susan: "Okay, I won’t go out with him. I mean obviously you have feeling for him." Edie: "No, I don’t. I really don’t." Susan: "So what then? If you can’t have him, nobody can?" Edie: "See? Now you’re thinking like a friend." Bree: "You have to hand it to Gabby and Carlos. They do grieve better than anyone." Gabrielle: "So, how much did that horse and buggy set us back?" Carlos: "Do you mind?" Gabrielle: "Being poor? A little." Susan: "I mean, one minute we’re making out in his truck and the next thing I know, we’re at the hospital and the doctor’s digging a bullet out of him. It’s just that when I started dating Mike, he seemed like such a normal guy, you know?" Bill: "They always do. You wanna get some nachos?" Susan: "I mean obviously I am not going to read the letter. At some point you just gotta let it go, right?" Bill "Right. You mind if we leave off the jalapeños? I’m not so good with spicy things." Susan: "I don’t mean to be babbling. It’s just really complicated and there is so much about Mike you don’t even know." Bill: "That would surprise me at this point." Bill: "Edie." Edie: "Your foreman said that you were out on a date with a hottie. Evidently, someone’s in need of Lasik." Susan: "You tracked us down?" Edie: "Oh, well, it wasn’t hard. I just followed the stench of betrayal." Mr. Steinberg: "We all share in your grief." Gabrielle: "Apparently." Mr. Steinberg: "And we’re hoping to alleviate any further pain your family may suffer by offering some monetary compensation. Provided you and your husband waive any future right to litigation, of course." Gabrielle: "Monetary compensation? You’re trying to buy us off?" Mr. Steinberg: "Let’s not get tangled up in legalese. We like to think of it as an extension of our caring." Gabrielle: "Well, in that case, care away." Mary Alice: "We all honor heroes for different reasons. Sometimes for their daring, sometimes for their bravery, sometimes for their goodness. But mostly we honor heroes because at one point or another, we all dream of being rescued. Of course, if the right hero doesn’t come along, sometimes we just have to rescue ourselves."